Walking the Dog, Among Other Things

Breastfeeding on demand, and other responsibilities as a new mom

I’ve had the opportunity to walk our dog, Champ, 3 times in the last 36 hours. And I love it.

Walking the dog had become a topic of discussion for a while. He stating (truthfully) that I didn’t walk him anymore. Her reminder of the time commitment of exclusively breastfeeding. On demand. Every day. All day. For 13 months so far.

While we’ve sorted through how to fairly weight care tasks like 2 daily dog walks, I still haven’t been able to spend that much time with Champ. My first born fur-son who had my heart until B came around—and as sad as it is to admit that, I know other first time dog moms relate.

That’s not to say Champ still doesn’t have a place in my heart, but it is extremely difficult to give him the attention he deserves when I’ve got a newborn attached to a boob ~8 hours of the day.

But lately, things are shifting. Every day B needs me a little less. Every day I’m equally excited for him and heartbroken for me that this is the last day he’s going to be this little. And every day I get a bit more freedom—the milk factory can be off the clock for a few minutes longer. The last 2 days have been the newest version of this loosening tie between us and now, while I’ve absolutely loved the time walking in the sunshine with Champ, I miss my baby B when I’m not at home.

Even though B has either been asleep or having breakfast while I’m on my 20-30 minute Champ walks, I still feel like I’m missing out.

Because I miss him when he’s asleep. Especially the last few weeks. He’s been sleeping so well (a very different reality than the last few months). Last night I didn’t actually see him for 10.5 hours and that felt way too long. I’m so used to cuddles all night long—him needing me all night long. I’m so used to seeing the clock strike 3:33am and feeling like it’s just us 2… Like we’re the only 2 living breathing beings awake in the entire world.

Speaking from the other side of all this, I can confirm that even the “worst” sleepers DO independently sleep in their cribs eventually. And you don’t even have to intervene in any way.

And if you’re stuck in it right now, arguing about who’s responsible for what and nitpicking minutes walked versus nap trapped, I promise you that there will be a day when you can walk out the door with an audiobook in your ears and not have to rush home.

I’ve been there. Now, sitting on the other side where it’s 8:32pm and the baby went down at 7pm and hasn’t made a peep since… I know you will get here too and when you do, you’ll maybe even cuddle them a little bit extra before bedtime. That’s where I’m at now. Squeezing in every last minute of the babyhood before my baby turns into a full child right in front of me.